MASTOR AAR CHATRO

Ek baar ek gramer mastermosai re taan ek chuto chatroy ek goti gorur doodh aniya dilo:
“Sal Sal, amar maye nani apnar lagi ek goti gorur doodh pathaison”. 

Master babu to doodh paiya khoob khusi oila. Tain koila:
"Isssh…oto kosto korar ki dorkar, tumar mare amar dik taki dhonyobad janaiyo. Boro bala manus tain."

Chatrotay koilo:
"Asole Sal..amrar ghoro nani kalke birale (cat) doodh-o mukh dilaisil. Otar-lagi to maye koila je apnare aye doodh ami ditam."

Master babur to ita suniya brohmo talu gorom oi gelo. Doodor goti re raage ii-taiya falaila. Goti falaite hi chatrotay je amon jure kanda shuru korlo………woyaaaaaa.

Mastere jigala: “oi..oi..kandos kene? Kita oise? Tor abar kita oise?"

Chatroytai koilo: "Kandtam nani….amarar goro ektai paykhanar goti asil ar itareo apne bhangi laila. Okhon amra paikhanat jaimu kirokom??"

TOILET-E SORDAR

Ek bar Brahmaputra Mail diya ek Sordar Delhi jar. Tar jokhon prosrab dorlo he Toilet-e giya dorja khuliya dekhe je bitre arekta Sardar. 

Asole bitre ekta aiyna (Mirror) asil. Sordare aynat tar reflection dekhia koilo "sorry bhaisahab, maaf karna". Tar pore he dorjar baire darailo onek somoy.

Ektu pore hey abar toilet-er dorja khuliya dekhe je arekta Sardar dekha jaar. Tara tari dorja bondo koriya darailo. 

Ektu pore hey okhon bujhlo je pante-punte muti dibo, kunu mote trainor ek chifat giya mutlo. Oto kosto koriya to tar matha gorom hoilo. Bhablo "halar beta Sordar, ticket-tuket nai mone-koy, otar lagi toilet-o dukiya boi-roise."

Train jokhon ekta station-o thamlo he Guard-re koilo (Guard-o ekta Sardar): "Guard sahab, dekhiye na toilet me ek admi bahut der-se chuppa huwa hai. Lagta hai uske paas ticket nahi hai aur isliye woh toilet se bahar nahi aa raha".

Guard-e ita suniya laf mari uthlo, " KYA BINA TICKET KA? SALE KO ABHI MEIN BATATA HUN".

Sardar nijer seato giya boilo ar Guard-ta gelo toilet dekhat. Ektu pore Sardar-e dekhlo guard-re. Sardar-e jigailo, "KYA HUA GUARD SAHAB, WOH MILA?"

Guard-tay aste aste koilo..."ARE BHAISAHAB, WOH TO RAILWAY STAFF KA AADMI HAI. WOH BHI GUARD HAI"

BRAIN EATING SCIENTIST

Bharoter Rajdhani Delhi te poisa dile sob kicchu pow-wa jai. Ek bar ek American scientist-e Delhit aiya bhablo “ajke manusher khiru (brain) khaimu".

Scientist dukano gelo. Giya deklo je sobche sosta brain oilo SILCHORI brain ar sobche dami brain oilo PUNJABI brain.

Ita dekhiya tar-chirlo tar Dukandar-er upre

SCIENTIST: “sourer baicha, pura songshare sobhe jane je Punjabi hoilo gondo-murkho, muta mata, ar tui ikano Punjabi brainer dam 50,000 taka rakhsos. Fari falai dimu. Chinos na amare. Ubha thuba dam nani? Sesh paibe”.

DUKANDAR: “Sir aapne matha gorm korba na. Sunoin amar kohta. Ashole ita Punjabi hoilo thubla...khiru nai. 2000 tare marle ekta brain pawa jai. Otar lagi dam beshi. Ar silchorer manushra khub khiru. Jare tare marleo brain pawwa jai. Otar lagi sosta. Simple DEMAND AND SUPPLY MODEL, buchoin-ni?"

BABA CHOUKHE DEKHIYAR NA

Ek bar chele babar kase giya koilo: Baba, baba, ami nani chouke bala koriya dekhiyar na. Mone hoy chosma lowa lagbo.

Sylheti babay chelere hatho doriya barir chator uupre loiya gelo.

Baba: Aicha, okhon ami tor chouker porikha loimu. How je dekha jar aakasho ita kita?

Chele: Baba ita hoilo chand, mane ‘Moon’

Baba: Isshh, oit to tor chowk pura theek ase. Tui ar koto dure dekhte?

TOOTA-TA BORO SUNDOR

Ek bar ek bondhur ghoro tar ar-ekta bondhu ghurat gelo. Giya dekhe je bondhuye khub sundor ekta tuta (parrot) palche. Tutar ek powwe lal-suta bandha ar ek powwe neel-suta. Bondhure he jigailo…”Isshh ita kita ba? Ae tutar pawwe suta bandha kene?"
Bondhuye koilo: Are beta ita hoilo chamatkari tuta. Sutat dori tan dile khub misti kota koy.

Bondhuta tokhon lal-sutat doriya tan dilo. Tutai koilo…”RAM, RAM”

Er pore hey Neel-sutat doriya tan dilo. Tutai koilo…”KRISHNA, KRISHNA”

Tokhon bondhutay bhablo ki…”dekhi sain duiyo sutat dori tan dile tuta-tai kita koi?
Duiyo sutat dori jei he tan dile, tutay koilo…” OI SUORER BAICCHA, DUIYO SUTAT DORI TAN DES KENE? JANOS NA AMI NEECHE PORI JAIMU JE…..TUI KITA MAL KHAIYA KANA HOIYA AISOS NI, MODON?"

YOUR HONOUR AMI CHUR NAY

Ek bar Judger samne ekta ukile jera korer.

Ukil: Tey tumi goru churi korso na?

Assami: Na...na...ita kita koin...ami churi korsi na.

Ukil: Kintu FIR-e lekha ase je tumi goru chur. Tey misa maath matray kene? Sothi kori kow kita oisil.

Assami: Your honour, ami goru churi korsi na...ami roshi churi korsi kintu ami jantam na je roshir agat ekta goru bandha asil. roshi loiya jei barit pousi gesi dekhi kita ekta goru-o aise. Ami nirdosi your honour, ami nirdusi.